Sim Chen Xing

As a Christian, we know full well that God is a God who knows all things better than anyone else on earth. The Bible is filled with references that informs us about God’s soveriegnty over people’s hearts and minds (Jeremiah 17:10; Jeremiah 20:12; Psalms 7:9; Revelations 2:23). So how does all of these play out in coaching? And if the purpose of coaching is to partner with clients in a “thought-provoking and creative process” so as to “inspire them to maximize their personal and professional potential” through the unlocking of “previously untapped sources of imagination, productivity, and leadership”, then that begs the question of whether or not we as human beings are even equipped to take up that role (ICF, 2024).

We are only humans. So that meant that we have limited knowledge within the little spheres of influence that we have crafted out for ourselves. How then, are we able to coach someone beyond our expertise? How then, are we able to coach people with differing skillsets, training, background, and experiences? How then, will we ever be able to “unlock previously untapped sources of imagination, productivity, and leadership”? How will we even know?

Truth is, the job of the coach is not to understand, let alone problem solve. The job of the coach is to listen, inquire, and reflect what we hear with no attachment of being right. Coaching enables the client to feel seen, heard, and valued. It does not matter if the domain that was shared was not the coach’s area of expertise. What matters is the clients’ openess to the coach and to themselves. What matters is whether the client is open to talking about the difficult issues; the real issues.

Beyond every issue that client shares, there seems to be always an underlying issue that triggers it. It is through a series of inquiry where coaches will be able to help clients uncover these and work on them. Often times, when these underlying issues are resolved, the original issue that clients have will automatically be resolved because of how interconnected these things are. But how can the coaching conversation even get to the underlying issue if the client is unwilling to share? That’s why ICF defined coaching as a partnership. It is the coach’s job to inquire, listen, and reflect. It is also the client’s job to be truthful and open. A one-sided dance is not a dance. You cannot clap with one hand. And I think, that’s the essence of coaching.

But where is God in all of these? Personally, I think that God is everywhere. Because God is a God who searches the hearts and minds, then it is safe to say that God knew our clients way before we as coaches do. In fact, I would argue that God knew our hearts and our minds much more than ourselves. Then, by this logic, God would know exactly how to help both the client and coach. On the clients’ side, God would know all the struggles the client is facing; both big and small. God would know what the client would need to work on. God will also know what are the underlying things affecting the client, and what is most important to the client at that very juncture in life. On the coach’s end, God will also know the factors that may influence the coaching session, and what needs to be done to make the coaching session a success. And because God doesn’t just know our hearts and minds, but controls it as well (Proverbs 21:1), then that would mean God have the absolute power to steer the conversation in a way that is pleasing in His sight and in a way that benefits the clients in ways that would otherwise not be possible.

Now, if God knew everything, can He improve lives without the need for coaches? Certainly! But if we hold by this logic, then why do we see so many people struggling in their lives? Within my circle alone, there are so many who are struggling about what career to pick, what subjects to study, who to date, whether or not to marry. If God were to intervene and point us to the best way forward, surely these will all be resolved. But they are not.

God provides us with the liberty to make choices while we are here on earth. God provides us with resources to manage, friends to consult, role models to model our lives, teachers to learn from, and people to care for. The coach is therefore, like a friend, albeit a professional one. A friend who journeys with you along life’s tough journey. A coach is a friend who first and foremost acknowledge our inability to know all things, but is a person who is willing to offer a listening ear, to inquire, and to explore with the clients about the issue they would like to talk about.

But what sets a Christian coach apart from an ordinary coach? A Christian coach trusts in the sovereignty of God over our hearts and minds while also acknowledging our human limitations. A Christian coach trusts the Lord’s ability to steer the conversation in a way that is best for the client in accordance to the Will of God.

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Hi! I am offering pro-bono coaching as part of my training to be a certified ICF coach. If you would like me to journey with you through your struggles in life, do feel free to hit me up! Do click on the link below to book a coaching session with me. Do remember to indicate “pro-bono coaching” as well as you met me through my website, simchenxing.com!